Monday, September 26, 2011

Adele, "Someone Like You"

I heard that you're settled down.
That you found a girl,
and you're married now.
I heard that your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.

Oh friend, why are you so shy?
Aint like you to hold back,
or hide from the light.
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face
and that you'd be reminded that for me,
it isn't over...

Nevermind how I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you, too.
Don't forget me,
I think I remember you said,
"Sometimes it last in love, but sometimes it hurts instead."
Sometimes is lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.

You know how the time flies...
Only yesterday was the time of our lives.
We were born and raised
in a summer haze,
bound by the surprise of our glory days.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face
and that you'd be reminded that for me,
it isn't over...

Nevermind how I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you, too.
Don't forget me,
I think I remember you said,
"Sometimes it last in love, but sometimes it hurts instead."

Nothing compares, 
no worries or cares,
regrets and mistakes,
they're memories made.
Who would have known how 
bitter-sweet this would taste?

Nevermind how I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you.
Don't forget me,
I think I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead."

Nevermind how I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you, too.
Don't forget me,
I think I remember you said,
"Sometimes it last in love, but sometimes it hurts instead."

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead...

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Feeling a little torn...

It's baby season again, I see all the new "sprouts" popping up all over Facebook. It almost makes me want another one... okay, simmer down... I said almost. ;)

Another nice thing about Facebook is that I've been able to watch all of my friends and acquaintances grow into their roles as mothers. It's nothing short of spectacular! Some take to it like a duck to water, and some struggle. In either instance it's nature at it's best, but it's always interesting to watch from a sociological standpoint.

I am a stay-at-home mom. Sort of. I mean, I have my etsy business, my wholesale business, and my blog that brings in a decent stream of money while I get to stay at home with my angel. So I guess I'm not a "true" SAHM, but as close as I could ever get without going insane. I feel as much like a SAHM as any other mom who stays at home, only because I keep up my business endeavors for more of a hobby, not for the money. However, I've noticed that the employment status of individual moms is sometimes a point of contention amongst people my age.

I see some who continually post things like, "I'm dead tired from work... but I'm doing it all for my little man!" or "Off on another business trip, 2 weeks this time, but it's all for the girl at home" etc. Obviously I completely understand when you have to work to pay the bills. But when your spouse is bringing in way more than enough to take care of bills, necessities, expenses, and savings what exactly is a two income household accomplishing when it's at the expense of the time you spend with your child?

Is it okay to justify working long hours, taking business trips, and leaving your kiddo with a sitter just so you can buy that fancy designer purse? (Or dress the kid in Gucci?) (Or drive a BMW?)

Or is it more realistic to justify doing without those types of luxuries so that your child has plenty of one-on-one parenting? (Play dates?) (Field trips?)

What is the real cost of parenting? 
And what are we willing to give/give up in order to have it all?

Maybe this query comes from a selfish point of view, in that over the course of the last year or so I have felt some of my other parent friends slipping away. I'm the only one I know who stays at home full time, though I'm not the only one who could. I feel the eyes scanning and judging me... maybe out of curiosity, maybe out of resentment, maybe out of jealousy. I don't really know, but it's difficult even as a parent to be the one viewed as an "outcast."

I personally have no problem with our decision. I think my husband and I are giving our daughter the best chance possible at life with me being at home with her. I know exactly what goes into her body, and exactly what comes out. She's not been sick one time since she was born, she's never had diaper rash, never needed a trip to the ER, and she's a pro at the whole teething thing. Not to mention the fact that she is the most mellow, easy going baby I have ever been around. Heck, she's more mellow and easy going than many of the ADULTS I know. That's saying something! ;)

Some would argue that all those "bad" things happen to babies because they need to learn. Well maybe, but it's not like I'm depriving her of anything. She plays freely, interacts with others, and is exposed to all manner of things life has to offer her as a 1 year old.

More importantly, I always know what's going on with her.

One of the most important parts of me being at home with her is that we always know that she's getting a healthy diet. My husband has Crohn's disease, so we are concerned about these things. Any Crohn's specialist will tell you that eliminating processed foods and preservatives from your diet is the best way to prevent and treat people with Crohn's. Since it's a disease determined largely by genetics, we have to give her the best chance possible to keep from getting it. Regulating her diet is the easiest way to do so. No, she's not Vegan, or Raw, or anything out of the ordinary... But I do know first hand that she's not eating processed foods, or foods with preservatives. And guess what? She loves everything I feed her. She doesn't know any different. Even if the Crohn's thing never pops up, at least she's off to a great start when it comes to eating well and enjoying a healthy lifestyle. That's something I feel good about every single day.

I have to believe most of the reason she's never been sick is because she doesn't go to daycare. I mean, she had a short bout with allergies when spring rolled around, but no colds, flu, ear aches, strep throat, or stomach bugs, and that's pretty awesome from what I understand. Luckily, we don't have to go the daycare route and she can forgo all these terrible sicknesses while she's a helpless baby. Obviously I know she'll get sick someday, but wouldn't it be nice for it to happen when she's old enough to understand what's going on?

My daughter also knows sign language. It's limited for now, but only by what she can pick up in a day. She's so sharp, it astounds me! Babies are supposedly born with a strong desire to learn, and given the right circumstances, are capable of amazing things at young ages. She's fortunate to have me at home all the time so she can learn about and ask me about anything and everything around her. She has unlimited attention (if she wants it), as well as the freedom to safely explore the world around her learning as she goes.

Some people may view all of those things as silly, or unnecessary. But we don't. We view them as important benefits to our arrangement. As a matter of fact, I'll go so far to call them "luxuries." No she doesn't wear Burberry clothes, or have a Louis Vuitton diaper bag, or a silver Tiffany's rattle, but my daughter has luxuries that will literally last her forever. I may look back on my life and feel a twinge of sadness that I never drove a convertible, or spent a month in Europe, but I will never look back and long for the time missed with my daughter. No designer purse, fancy car, or pair of shoes could ever take the place of that gift.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Monday blues on Tuesday

Tuesdays are my Mondays... Hubby works his contract job Tuesday thru Friday, and is "off" Saturday thru Monday. Except lately, he's been working like a dog catapulting us towards our 5-year plan, so we don't get much time together.

No matter what, Monday is always our day. We may do nothing, but we always have at least one day as a family. With all this work going on, it's nice to have that insurance. We are such hermits, and we so treasure our time together, so having just one day is tough.

But... while we're working and away from each other, we're both dreaming of this...

And this...

and a little bit of this too...

Washington State. 

That's right... this is the grand dream. Moving to Washington, having some land, {which is apparently very affordable up there and easier to get than down south here} and just being free

Free to be ourselves, not entangled in a community of strangers in a suburb. Not bound by the ridiculous rules and busybodies of the HOA... ANY HOA. Watching our little girl run and play and truly have the chance to enjoy nature. 

Quiet. Peace. Seclusion.

No bumping bass pulling up across the street at 2am, no inconsiderate neighbors who let their cats run wild and pee all over our porch, kill my flowers, and eat our cat's food {who does not run wild consequently}. Nobody parking in front of our house. No registered sex offenders living too close for comfort. No unpredictable and unregulated renters junking up the neighborhood. No traffic. No one else's barking dogs. No neighbors smoking in the back yard, smoke wafting over the fence while the baby plays. 

Just us. Doing our thing. Being a family. And truly living.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

The not-so-off, day off...

I've been neglecting my personal blog. Again. But dang it if I can't find a spare minute to pop in and write about something. Anything. Let alone something though provoking, interesting, or captivating. {sigh}

I've been working like a dog. Seriously. Which sounds weird, I know, because I'm technically a "stay-at-home mom" and whatnot. But my business is booming, and I'm admittedly struggling to keep up. I fear I'm going to have to change my store policies yet again because my standard 3-5 day turnaround promise is just not working out any more! Plus, I'm working on some new lines to debut, and exploring some new projects as well. All of this while also working on my "Little Birdie Blog" networking, turtorials, and upcoming guest blogs and feature pieces. I'm pooped. And I'm a full-time stay at home mom. So there's that.

So today I decided to take the day off. No looking at my shop stats, no renewing listings every 4 hours, no working on orders, no working on the new lines, no catching up on future blog posts, nothing. Day off.

Except that the moment I stop working, I see boxes of Christmas decor that still need to go in the attic, I see the dishwasher that needs to be emptied, I see dust collecting on the shelves, I see that I'm about out of baby food and I need to make some more, I see that I need to go grocery shopping, and I see about 10 loads of laundry that needs to be done.


"Day off"

It's kind of exhausting to have to be "on" 24/7... like for real. I've had jobs in the past where I worked 60-80 hours a week but I always had at least one day. One day to rest and rejuvenate, one day to sleep in, one day to myself.

I imagine that now, but even in my imaginary day off I miss my little girl. I'm so attached to her... If I even take off to go shopping while hubby watches her, I still think about her. It's always been that way with my hubby too. I guess I'm just an attached person when it comes to the ones I love.

Of course I'm sure hubby is feeling much the same way. He's already worked every single day this week. I know all of this is helping us get to the place we want to be, but the "getting there" is tough. It's hard to remind ourselves that the sacrifices we make today result in our "happier" ending later. When we don't have to rent anymore. When we don't have to be surrounded by people you don't know living just feet away across the fence. When the baby will have all the room in the world to run and play and do whatever tickles her little girl fancy. Someday...

However, my super sweet hubby did get me a massage for my birthday on Friday, so I do have to say that I'm super pumped for that. :) And my momma is coming to visit in two weeks, and she's offered to watch the little booger so hubby and I can go out for a night. I'm looking forward to that, too. :)

Okay... well off to my day off: no work, just... um... other work. LOL


Monday, November 15, 2010

a new look!

I updated my blog appearance today! I've been tinkering with blog design and it's pretty fun! So far I've only done my own blogs, but I'm pretty proud of the results. Here's what I've done so far:

Yay!! I love making things look "just so", I think it helps me write better because I'm not so focused on the asthetics, etc.

another big change...

Well, as some of you know a few months ago I changed the URL to my blog. Long story short, I felt like I HAD to, but I never WANTED to.

I'm not sure how the Blogger reader works but I'm sort of thinking maybe the URL change changed the settings for my followers. Either that or everyone decided they were sick of my blog on the exact same day because I haven't heard from anyone since!

So... I changed it back today.

The reasons I changed it in the first place no longer apply. I've put it all behind me and anyone from that incident who wants to resurface is welcome to do so, but should be prepared to handle what they're going to get from me if they do.

This is probably a good time to reiterate the fact that my blog (check that- ALL of my blogs)  and all the content past, present and future has now been legally copyrighted. Any use of my material is subject to my approval, and any attempt to alter such material is now legally punishable by law. Sucks that I had to do that, but some really nefarious, dishonest, amoral, selfish, unprincipled (and probably also jealous) people forced me into a corner.

No matter!! All bases are now covered, and I still may see some VERY lucrative outcomes as a result very bad behavior. < insert the wicked laugh of my lawyer >

So here we are! Back to Rachael's Carrma! I hope that I see some of my old blog friends back again and have a chance to make new ones. Of course, I am also still running my little blog for my daughter, as well as the blog for my company, and contributing to other blogs all about the web, so there will be no shortage of writing on my end!! I wish you all a glorious day!!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010


It's certainly no secret that since I became pregnant, just the thought of this wonderful little girl has given me a huge wave of inspiration. Starting with the nursery, it has just been flowing from me like rain! The fact that she's renewed my creative streak after somewhat of a dry spell has really made me feel like myself again. :) The magic of this little girl never ceases to amaze me!

My latest wave has led me to really exciting venture... opening my own Etsy store! For those of you who may not be familiar with Etsy, it's a great website for people to buy and sell artisan goods. You can find all kinds of awesome stuff there!

Anyway, I am always on the quest for something cute for her to wear, and one day it suddenly dawned on me that I should just make it! I started experimenting with fabric dyes and the rest is history... 

Here's one of my favorites with my little sweetie being kind enough to model it for us!

There's a box in my task bar to the right on this page that is showcasing some samples, as well as a link to the store. Otherwise, you can go here: