new tunes.

Rarely do I make music recommendations. People are very particular about their music, and are generally hard to persuade away from that. But I must say, if you are looking for something new, or something different, or even looking to fall in love with some new music, you should definitely check out Blue October's new album, "Approaching Normal."

It's incredible. He's taken his edgy, angry music, and always insightful lyrics, and turned it into something positive without losing the edge! It's great. I know I've said before that my writing has been suffering because of all the "happy" clouding up my mind anymore, so I'm totally inspired to hear someone else making that transition so seamlessly.

Blue October has always been a great escape soundtrack for life. When I've found myself in a dark and twisty place, Justin has the lyrical mastery to reflect that void back in a way that moves me to the core. But much like many of us who are growing up and finding true happiness in our lives, he's taking a more sentimental approach and sharing those same transitional time periods with us. There's at least 3 songs on this new album that bring me to tears for their resemblance to my life pre- and post-Jerry and I getting together life.

Maybe I relate to it so well because a couple of years ago, I was beginning to think I would never find happiness. Sure, I assumed I would eventually get married, and I might be happy in a way; but I never expected to feel what I feel with Jerry, and to have what we have with each other. This is just so much different, and I say this after nearly 3 years, and 4 years of being friends before that.

Back then, I was messed up. Not so bad that others really knew, but bad enough that I have volumes of journals and blogs to remind me. I was lost. Lost in a way that there are some periods of that past that I can't even remember. There were lots of things I couldn't see. I couldn't see the destrctive relationships I was in, I couldn't see the bad decisions I was making, and I couldn't see the people around me who REALLY cared about me. What's worse, Jerry was my friend for a really long time before the light switch went on regarding us. I can't even really pinpoint what it was, or exactly when, but I know when everything changed. I grabbed his face one night when we had been out hanging with friends, and told him "I love you." The rest is history.

So when I hear Blue October sing "I saw forever in my never" I understand in a way that many people probably don't. I feel the pain that was there before. I feel the excitement of realizing something very important was happening in my life. I feel the overwhelming happiness that now engulfs me entirely. It's an experience beyond just music. It's a peek into my soul... a part of my soul that I haven't thought about in a really long time, but that I should make a point to never forget.

They say without pain, pleasure has no meaning. I believe that's true.